Prescreening

Warning: This post may be prescreened

After knowing my tweets and Facebook statuses are prescreened, I thought I would probably publish a post before my blog gets on the radar and is prescreened as well.

I am also baffled by the word “Prescreen”, my English is extremely poor and I am still unsure about the exact meaning of “prescreening”. Would it mean that someone would read my mind and stop me from saying, writing, expressing my views?

How good it would be if we could have prescreened crime and corruption.

So the government is introducing the “Prescreening” bill and Anna Hazare and Baba Ramdev have already announced hunger strikes against it.

BJP and the left are stalling the parliament procedure as usual, but the government is pretty confident that they will get the bill passed.

Mr. Kapil Sibal has announced in a press conference that it will generate at least 2 million jobs since all the tweets, every Facebook status update, all blogs, websites, emails needs to be prescreened. A proposal for FDI in this regards is also being discussed.

Two years down the line the government is planning to rope in a Mr. Nandan Nilekani likes, give him a cabinet rank and make him automate the process. Since it would involve a lot of IT, the people in IT fields are happy. Everybody is expecting a 140% hike in their salary. The top 4 IT companies will soon include a “Prescreening” service in their portfolio.

Microsoft has announced a new version on Windows OS; it is named “Windows Prescreened”, or windows with a screen.

Google has come up with new “Prescreened search” which will display only prescreened search results and web pages.

Mark Zuckerberg is coming up with a new “Prescreened Social Network” idea and the website should be up and running before the bill gets introduced in the parliament.

The telecom companies have been asked to prescreen the sms and phone conversations.  The government has assured that there would be no losses to the exchequer this time round. The likes of Tatas, Radias, BDutts, and VSinghvis are not too happy about phone conversations being prescreened.

You might hear about a “Prescreening scam (ghotala)” some five years down the line.

Airport authorities are confused, whether they need to screen or “prescreen” travelers and their luggage.  Also Mr.  Robert Vadera is exempted from being prescreened at the airports.

Now I have this weird feeling that someone has already logged onto my system and wordpress would not allow me to post this. Funnily instead of “working” or “updating” the status on the site now reads as “Prescreening….please wait and do not close this window”.

P.S: There were few lines about Sonia Gandhi in the post, but unfortunately the lines got removed in the prescreening  process.

7 thoughts on “Prescreening

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