11 Funny Resume Blunders

Everyone makes mistake. Especially with English being our second or third language most of us always do; when writing, or talking in English. I make mistakes too, a lot of times; most recently I made one in my yesterday’s blog post titled “what if?” I wrote, “Call it sadism” and after posting realized that being a sadist cannot be translated to “call it sadism”, sadism and being a sadist have a subtle difference in meaning. I might make some mistakes in this blog post too.

Mistakes made in blog post, Facebook, orkut, twitter are ok as long as they are shared with friends , family and acquaintance, but one should be extra careful while sending out professional communication, conducting business, and especially when you are writing your resume. I feel your resume is your professional self on paper. You are portraying your professional qualities, your work experience, everything that you have gained from learning, in your resume.

Being an interviewer for past 2 years now, the best part I like about recruiting/ interviewing process is resume screening. I and like me, I am sure the recruitment/HR team as well, must be spending some wonderful, funny and entertaining moments while screening the resumes.

The very first resume that came to me for screening was 12 pages long; the name of the person was taking up half of the first page with his key skills written in a decorating, unreadable format with font size 48. Can you imagine?

Another resume had a career objective “To get a job”, how precise…

I can’t help but post some funny things I found on several of resumes I received.  I cannot share the names of people whose resume these are, but trust me, whatever I am mentioning below is true, and I still have all the resumes with me.

  1. Intent to work in an organization which will help me to explore myself fully. What kind of organization are you looking to work for?
  2. The contact email id mentioned in the resume was nightdelight@******.com  great; it can get you a night shift job.
  3. In a section titled Experience summary, one candidate applying for a post of software programmer, wrote; “My job responsibilities included designing bevel gears, and shop floor inspection for unit producing bevel gear”. The company for which this job responsibility was mentioned is a well-known IT company. I wonder from when they have started designing bevel gears.  Bad copy-paste job. A friend surely must be in gear manufacturing company.
  4. Under Hobbies, one candidate wrote, “Donating blood, have donated 16 liters so far.” No comments really.
  5. Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a project of team size 8. No wonder you are looking for job change dude.
  6. Good at ‘pubic’ speaking.  
  7. Skills: “Written communication = 3 years; verbal communication = 5 years. IT= 8 years”.  Guess total =? Solving a mathematics problem?
  8. “Objective: To have my skills and ethics challenged on a daily basis.” Did you copy it from a website that was listing resume blunders and did not realize it?
  9. “I perform my job with effortless efficiency, effectiveness, efficacy, and expertise.” Whoa. What was that?
  10. 3 year old IT professional. 3 years old? And you want us to recruit you as a software engineer?
  11. Resume was of Miss XYZ and there was a declaration section which had the name of Miss ABC. “I hereby declare that all the information mentioned above is true to the best of my knowledge.”  That’s what friends are for right? Stand by you come what may…

Funny isn’t it? But let me tell you none of the above resume got shortlisted, my organization did not want to recruit people who cannot devote time to prepare a decent resume for themselves. At times I felt that we were being a little inconsiderate, but no, over the years I have realized the importance of a good resume.  Having a good resume is a must to survive in today’s competitive professional world, since it is your resume that gets noticed before you. It has the power of making a great first impression.

From past year and half, I have been studying various resumes, reading a lot of material on what a resume should have and what it should not. I have talked to lot of senior recruiters, HR managers, to get an understanding on what they see and how do they screen out resumes.

All agreed that a candidate with good resume but with lesser expertise gets preference over a candidate whose resume is poorly formatted but has strong expertise. I cannot agree fully, but to some extent it is true. The presentation matters. Your resume gets to your recruiter before you and based on your resume he creates an image of you in his/her mind. Your resume is your first impression.

So what are waiting for? Go check how your resume looks now? Or better send it to me to find out any blunder that you may have committed. I promise I will not post your blunders.

Note: I intent to publish this article on a new blog I am planning to start around the same theme. Image source: Google images, let me know if you want them removed.

5 thoughts on “11 Funny Resume Blunders

    1. hmm please do.. you have my email🙂
      I can seriously look at resume, and if you want suggest some changes (if required)
      I have done this for couple of my friends now and they liked it.

  1. Hey.. I have seen some resumes (friends , friends of friends etc) and some had literally killed English… and they got really great jobs… it makes me think, do people really pay so much attention to detail when they need resources? You will just give that guy a call if his skill are a match to the requirement, right? And if he is good in technical things, he most probably gets the job… so I wonder to what extent does it matter really? Also be ready, I am sending my resume to you soon and not going to pay anything.. hehe😛 I will check your resume as a favor in return😀

    1. sure.. waiting for ur resume dude.. mail me..🙂

      and as far as I understand and I may be wrong, resume does not get you a job, and it is not meant to get you a job, if it does then good but that’s not resume’s primary function. If I understand correctly it is to get you shortlisted for an interview. If you are good at your skills you will end up getting up job, but getting a resume screened by killing English language is difficult. Probably the recruiters did not get many resumes to screen, otherwise poor resumes go straight to trash bins as they do not project a personal professionally and properly.

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